We've Been Living our Happily Ever After for

Monday, May 26, 2014

An entry that is 373 days late

I gave birth to Reese on May 18, 2013 at 5:30 in the afternoon and yet I can remember most, if not all the details. This might be the longest kwento in my blog history ever, so brace yourself if you do decide to read it :)

I was at 38 weeks so I had weekly check ups, which was set on that day. It was Saturday and we arrived at the hospital past 10:00 am and we were wondering if the line in the outpatient clinic was long. We would go to Trinoma after, have lunch there, then sleep over at my in-laws, savoring our final weeks of "freedom" before Reese came. The week prior, my bp shot up to 140 from its usual 110 so I was excited to see if the meds worked.

Lo and behold, when I stepped into Dr. Lim's clinic, it was still at 140. My doctor was concerned because the meds didn't work and asked me to buy a different one. Hubby said that when I was away, she expressed concern over my blood pressure, being that I'm already full term and could give birth every moment. I was feeling nervous myself and then she called a nurse and asked her to repeat taking my pressure just to be sure. Boom, it was 180/100.

The doctor said she couldn't let me go home with my bp so high. She said that if my bp goes down within the day, I can go home but if not, they would perform a c-section within the day. I was endorsed to the emergency room. In the ER, the nurse raised eyebrows at my very lavender nails(sorry, I was supposed to attend a wedding the week before if not for my bp!) and cleaned them. In a bit, they inserted a catheter which gave the weirdest feeling eveeeeer- it's like peeing non-stop  and you feel like it would fall off any moment, but not really. They also gave me a series of new meds, which were all supposed to lower my bp but to no avail. One was the weirdest of all as it made me feel as if my whole body was exposed to a gigantic hair blower, which lasted for about 15 minutes but even that didn't help. At about 1:00pm, an elderly guy walked in and was put in the bed next to mine and he kept breathing heavily. The nurses must have seen the horrified look on my face and pulled the curtains on my bed so I couldn't see the elderly man anymore.

Ang landi kasi ni buntis, ayan tuloi 

It has been more than 2 hours since I stepped in at the ER and believe it or not, it was only at this point that I gave up hopes of my KFC lunch in Trinoma. My BP would range between 150-170 so they decided to endorse me to the Labor Room. 

It was so weird going up the ramp- I felt like I would fall off any moment and I kept thinking on how embarrassing it would be to be probably the first person to fall off a hospital cot. (Pardon the mundane concerns I was thinking of, I have never been hospitalized in my life). I didn't fall off(thank goodness) and I passed by one other room where two women were in labor. I was brought to the second room and I was alone. I requested if I could talk to my husband but they said no, and it would have to wait. They continued what was being done downstairs- checking my bp, giving me meds, checking Reese's heart monitor. 

Since the heavily-breathing elder was gone and probably due to the cooler room temperature, my bp was between 140-160. I was elated but they didn't seem so. Reese's heart rate wasn't a concern, it was always between 130-145, which was really good and normal. In moments when the nurses went out, I would rub my belly and talk to him, but my little guy didn't seem to be in the mood for bonding.

The nurses acted as if I wasn't there and went about to talk about "stuff". There were two of them and one was named Jenny. She told the other that she has a salary dispute and went on to explain why and the other advised her on what to do. I was amused at how everything was so normal to them whereas I was undergoing one of the biggest moments of my life. I wasn't really angry, just amused at how nonchalant they were about the whole thing.

Another hospital staff came in and I wasn't sure if she was a doctor or a nurse. She gave me a piece of paper and asked me to write my baby's name on it. She came back in a bit and showed me two tags. One had my name and the other had Reese's. She went on to explain that I would wear my tag and if Reese would be born that day, he would wear the one with his.

After that, there were four people who were constantly checking on me- a very rude male doctor, a female staff and the two nurses. The female staff asked me to sign some forms and stuff. The rude male doctor injected magnesium on my butt cheeks, which he explained to me was supposed to prevent convulsions. He kept making jabs at my weight and bp, saying that I shouldn't eat too much chicharon the next time I get pregnant if I don't want him to inject that magnesium again in my butt. He's lucky that he was freaking ugly already, that mine and Reese's lives depended on his and that the magnesium hurt so bad. If not, I would have punched him right at his stupid unprofessional face till he looked like a goblin. He injected the magnesium one butt cheek at a time and it was the most painful thing ever out of this whole experience. I felt the magnesium seep through my body, passing through my veins and I stopped moaning after a while because it took away all the energy I had. I kept crying and all I wanted was for it to stop.

The rude doctor might have given a signal or something, or it was probably my ob, or Jenny the nurse might have settled her salary dispute but they did let me talk to Arnold after that. He was wearing a mask, lab gown and all, so that he'd be allowed to enter the labor room. He kept stroking my hair, as if I was a baby and he was much calmer than the Arnold who was with me in the ER. He told me not to be nervous, that my sister was waiting with him outside, that they'd be in the room once I got out. I just smiled and didn't let him know about the painful injection since it might cause him to panic again. We parted ways and he went outside again.

The female staff walked in and asked me if I was ready and said "Mommy, ready kana? wow! birthday na ni baby today". It sank in that yes, his birthday would be May 18, 2013. 5-18-13. I pondered if it would have been better if he was born on a different day and I realized that I didn't have a choice anyway, so whatevs. Dr. Lim walked in, all smiles and said that she'd do an IE. She said that my cervix was very much closed, that she talked to Arnold, and confirmed that we'd do the CS that afternoon. She said she doesn't want to take risks and when I nodded, she stepped out and a new set of staff assisted me to the delivery room.

They prepped me for surgery in the delivery room. I realized that there was nothing special about the room- it was like one big bathroom and it was actually the people and the equipment that made it remarkable. One of them was dismayed that my hooha wasn't shaved and said "Ay, hindi nga pala nagpapashave si Dra. Lim".  I wanted to answer back but the lady didn't talk to me at all so I thought, why bother? The anesthesiologist, Dr. Bernardino, did his first attempt to inject the anesthesia. It was easier said than done and before long, he asked the assistance of Jenny the nurse to help me bend so he can inject the meds. In a bit, he became successful and asked me a series of questions to check that the anesthesia was working. It was and though I could feel him poke my thighs, they were numb and he could've dropped a hammer and I wouldn't feel a thing. 

Doc Alice walked in and asked me, "April, ano na nga ulit baby mo?" Sabi ko " Boy po". Sabi nya, "start na tau". At this point, I couldn't see her anymore as the big cloth has been put to obscure my view. They started talking in technical terms as SOP that the operation has begun. Dr. Bernardino kept asking me to sleep but I didn't want to. I've never been hospitalized and damn it, I'd stay awake every freaking minute throughout this operation if I could. I did space out on certain times and when I asked if they've taken out Reese already, he replied, "ayun na sha o, yung umiiyak sa kabila". It was music to my ears. In next to no time, I knew that they were done and soon, one nurse was counting the instruments. Dr. Bernardino kept saying that he wanted Bulalo, and again, the normality was beyond me.
I couldnt believe that he was only 5.9 lbs, given how big my belly was

By this time I was mostly alone in the room except for a female nurse who I assume was designated to look after me. I told her it was hot, so she kindly turned on the air-conditioner back on and we didn't talk much. I asked her what time we would go up and she said at about 9pm. It was one of the longest waits of my life. I couldn't sleep and I kept looking at my belly and I thought that I should have taken a photo once I found out that this would be the last day of my pregnancy. 

The female nurse came back holding Reese and it was the most surreal moment of my life. I cant believe I was meeting the boy who was with me for nine months. I cant believe how small he was. I said "Anak, sinong kamukha mo?" and the nurse said "Baby sumagot ka nga." I guess it was hospital protocol and she showed me Reese's junk and his tag that was shown to me a while back.  It would have been the happiest moment of my life if not for the next thing that she said " Mommy, kakausapin ka po ni Doctora Roque, ung pedia".

Hindi ako sigurado kung sinong kamukha ni Reese- basta cgurado lang akong hindi ako
Dr. Roque talked to me in the alley and she then asked me the scariest questions you can ask a mom who just gave birth:

"Mommy, nagkasakit kaba nung buntis ka? Anong sakit mo? Uminom kaba ng gamot nung nagka-uti ka?"

"Regular kaba nagpapa-check up? Gaano kadalas? Kelan ka nagsimulang magpacheck-up"

"Mataas ang bacteria count ng baby mo, i-antibiotics natin sha. Ayoko mag take ng risk, huwag na natin hintaying maging malala si baby bago natin agapan kung kelan grabe na."

It broke my heart that Reese had to take meds being so young and that I would spend the night in the ob ward without him. I was poker-faced when I saw my hubby and my sister when I entered the room and I dunno how I survived until the next day- because I was delirious with hunger, thirst, the physical pain of the fading effects of anesthesia and the emotional pain of spending the night without my little boy.

Fast forward to today and Arnold and I are the parents to a boy who:

Loooooooooooooves going outside and swimming. 
Weighs about 12 kilograms, or more like a ton of limestone by the way it feels
Couldn't care less about what's on tv but likes dance music,especially mash ups
can say "tata" and "nana" to refer to Arnold and I, and "da-da" to things that he likes
I love more than anybody and anything in this world.

Happy 1st birthday and 8 days my dear. My blog post might be one year and 8 days late but worry not that my love is any less than the first day I met you <3
No matter how big you get, you will always be my baby boy :)


No comments:

span.fullpost {display:inline;}